Not doing something rarely works [So what does?]

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Have you ever set out to “not” do something………..

Then pretty much immediately done it?

I’m not drinking tonight”

Followed, pretty quickly, by drinking.

“No snacking this week” and then snacking.

“I’m not going to have that tub of Haagan Dazs in the freezer” then inhaling it on the sofa.

You know what I mean.

The human brain isn’t very good at “not doing” stuff.

If anything it just hears the last bit.

The “drinking”, “snacking” or “eating that tub of Haagan Daz”.

Focusses on that.

Then does it.

At best we end up with what I often refer to as a “cake shaped hole”.

That needs filling at some point.

Probably with cake.

Our brain much prefers to be “doing something” than not.

To concentrate on doing something different, perhaps.

Something else that has some or all of the benefits.

Eat or drink to feel better?

Could something else makes us feel, at least, better enough?

A walk, a workout, meditating, an activity we enjoy, etc.

Might not be quite the same, but it’s ‘something’.

Something to do rather than trying not to not do something else.

Something that will make us feel, at least, an amount better.

Arguably more so overall, with the absence of a ‘downside’.

Spend hours scrolling on social media or stick our head in the fridge “because we’re bored”?

What else could we do that will make us less bored?

Like the connection gained from doing something with someone else?

What else could we do with them that has the same benefit?

As always, no right or wrong.

If “not doing” something works for you, crack on.

If it hasn’t, perhaps we could look at what you could do instead?

Much love,

Jon ‘Going Out’ Hall

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Dad to Oli, Izzie, Jamie and Charlie, husband to Alex ad Chief Ninja @ RISE